So Derek and I got to walk around New York a lot this weekend as we were apartment-hunting for an UWS place. It was ridiculously hot--80's and low 90's at some point. As a result, sun-starved New Yorkers poured out to the streets like lemmings on their migration to death, and what an ordeal it was. Both Derek and I was getting antsy coming into physical contact with so many people.
Most walking was on Saturday, but we also did some on Sunday. And after two days of extensive walking, I have to vent this out.
Skins. Specifically, females. Once in a small group back in Boston, one guy shared how difficult it was for a guy to keep his eyes from wandering purposefully in the spring. I completely agreed with him at that time based on how girls just show so much more of themselves once the weather changes from 30 degrees to 60 degrees (it's Boston). I remember wondering how Harvard seemingly turned into a nude beach in April--relatively speaking--from a part of Antartica in February.
But last two days made me realize that New York is a totally different ball game. Let me put it this way: 90% of my time on streets this weekend, I could not turn around without seeing someone with a low-cut tank-top, a see-through shirt, or a no-bra outfit.
It was good to have Derek on the side because I think my eyes would have preferred to soak in these sights if I were alone and no one could really see what I was doing. But it also got me thinking as to what it is about those outfits that are so attractive to wear. I ran through some possible explanations:
1) Practicality. Yes, it's hot and no one wants to sweat in a black t-shirt with long pants. I also can see how some female-specific clothing items such as bras can be annoying when you're sweating in the heat.
2) Beauty. I can see how some girls like summer clothes in general because they're more "beautiful".
3) Attention. Pride. Self-Image.
It is the last one that makes me sad and angry at the same time. I know girls have it tougher in terms of these issues that men simply cannot understand. And I know that the society, especially today, points to showing more than less. And I know that sometimes it is probably the last thing girls want to acknowledge as a reason for wearing less.
But as a guy who wants to appreciate a girl and her beauty, I can tell you whether it was for reasons 1), 2) or 3), those things simply distract when you show too much. I don't have a good general sense for what is too much and what ain't (aside from my own), but if you notice guys in the street ogling at you more than usual, it could just be that you are showing too much.
Does a guy get off scotfree in this? No, I don't think so. A man commits adultery in looking at women lustfully (Matthew 5:28). And trust me, when my eyes wandered purposefully, it was a constant drool-and-slap-myself-in-face routine.
But I do want to implore one thing from girls. Help us. I don't think most girls that I know as friends resort to wearing less for 3), but even if it's for 1) and 2), could you please keep us in mind? We really do not want to be distracted when talking to you or looking at you. We already have 1,459,499 New Yorkers who will wear very little no matter what we think, so any help will be appreciated. Thank you.
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